Ingredients

For the tofu and dredge:

• ¼ cup all-purpose flour (for coating)
• 1 teaspoon salt 
• ½ teaspoon ground black pepper
• 1 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1 teaspoon onion powder
•  ½ teaspoon poultry seasoning
•  1 block super firm tofu

For the pan and sauce:

• ½ stick dairy-free or regular butter
• ½ shallot, minced
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• 2 teaspoons fresh thyme
• 8 oz cremini mushrooms, sliced
• ¾ cup Marsala wine
• ⅓ cup cooking sherry

For the Undergarments and Garnish:

• Mashed Tators, however you like them. 
• Or noodles I guess.
• Fresh Parsley Garnish

• Extra-firm tofu works best for crisping.
• More Shallots never hurt anyone

Step 1 — Create the dust of destiny (the dredge):

Dump these into a wide bowl like you’re preparing a ritual circle. I like pie plates, personally. Whisk aggressively until it looks uniform and emotionally stable:

•  ¼ cup all-purpose flour,  
•  1 teaspoon salt,  
•  ½ teaspoon black pepper,  
•  1 teaspoon garlic powder,  
•  1 teaspoon onion powder, and  
•  ½ teaspoon poultry seasoning   

Step 2 — Slice dat tofu:

• Take your 1 blocks of super firm tofu and slice them into ¼-inch thick cutlets. 
• Try to make them even. They won’t be. Accept this. 
• One by one, press each tofu slab into your flour mixture. Flip, coat again, shake off the excess if you want a light coat, then line them up on a plate or pan.

Step 3 — Enter the frying arena:

• Heat a large skillet over medium-high heat. 
• When it feels right, add  ½  full stick of butter (dairy-free or dairy-full, we do not discriminate here). Let it melt into a dangerous golden pool.
• Add the tofu pieces carefully. Give them space, they are becoming something new. 
• Cook 3–5 minutes per side until they turn golden brown and crispy like they finally found purpose. If they start cooking too fast, turn the heat down before you create charcoal. You don't want your spouse to see that. Set aside on some paper towels, let them rest.

Step 4 — Bring in the Real Hero:
Once the tofu is browned, unleash:

•  3 cloves minced garlic  
•  ½ minced shallot  
•  8 oz sliced cremini mushrooms  
•  2 teaspoons fresh thyme  
•  ¾ cup Marsala wine  
•  ⅓ cup cooking sherry  
   

Yes, it will smell intense. Yes, this is correct. Let is soak, simmer, and reduce into perfection. 'Watery' is not perfection. It should be about the consistency of brown gravy. 7–10 minutes at least, more time if it's not looking healthy yet. 

Step 5 — Final adjustments:
Taste it. Add salt and pepper to taste, DON'T OVERDO THE SALT! If you do, you didn't get the recipe from me. 

Step 6 — Presentation matters (apparently):
Throw some fresh parsley on top to convince people you are serious. Serve immediately over mashed potatoes or fresh pasta (Potatoes always wins in this house) like the comfort meal this has secretly become.

Step 7 — Consume immediately:
Eat while hot. Stare proudly at what you have created. You have turned soybeans and wine into something respectable.